Friday, November 27, 2009

Rockford, IL/What is your opinion of adoption for gay couples?

Welcome to my Rockford home for Thanksgiving! Flora is an exchange student from Nanking, China that my mom and Steve are hosting. She's here to study and apply for a masters degree to become a nurse anesthetist an American university.

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© Jasmin Chang 2009

Answer: It's a controversial topic. I think it's so weird because something--a topic like that-- will only come up in Western countries. In China, it would never happen...at least not right now. In China, if people are homosexual, they completely conceal themselves from the public. Even their close friends and families don't know.

Personally, I do not like this idea because from a psychological aspect, kids will get confused. Based on medical knowledge, childhood is very important, especially in learning sexual preference. I believe that kids will be greatly influenced by their gay parents. It seems like we forfeit their right to be a straight person, although until today, we don't have the medical studies to actually prove this, but I think it would be cruel to do that kind of medical study on innocent kids.

I can understand homosexual couples wanting to be married, wanting a family and kids but just like any controversial topic, they always claim that it is their right, but they are thinking mostly of their own happiness and joy, not of the child. I think it is selfish. I just don't want them to give their influence to kids. Adults...it's their decision, but when kids are raised in their family, then they will be taught to accept absolutely that it is natural.

I ask her to tell me more about the attitude toward homosexuality in China.

Most Chinese people are not that open to see homosexuality as in the states. All the family members will think it's a shame to their families. That's why they try to conceal it from the public. As far as I know, some people even get married and have children, but they have a close boyfriend or girlfriend. In China, at home, in the workplace, in college, no one will mention it because it's not a hot topic in China. I think only young and educated people, only those who study English, will discuss it in classes as they learn about controversial issues in America. If people dare tell others that they are homosexual, and if they have family, their family will shun them. Chinese parents always have high expectations on their children and to declare that you are a homosexual, absolutely it is a shame, based on Chinese culture.

I ask her why she thinks there is a difference in attitude towards homosexuality between the China and the United States.

American culture honors change. They welcome change and they are not as afraid of making mistakes. When it comes to progress, making mistakes is not a big deal and you can improve or just start over. Chinese culture is 5000 years old and in China, mistakes are terrible. You are taught from when you are little that even the smallest mistake is unnacceptable. At school, you learn to keep quiet because the more you talk, the more chances there are for you to make a mistake. It's a kind of psychological harm. Most Chinese people do not have that confidence because your parents, peers, teachers tell you 'you can't do that,' 'that's stupid,' 'it's just a daydream.' It's a culture of conformism; the government teaches us since we're young to be the same, not different. If you do something different, people will think what you are doing is something dangerous, and it will make people feel unsafe around you and they will teach you a lesson for that. That's why most Chinese people try to stay away from politics. Nowadays even thought it seems improved, that nothing as horrible as the Cultural Revolution will happen again, it is still better to take the safe road that your forefathers took.

Question: If you knew you would die in a month, what kinds of things would you do?

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